Monday, July 1, 2013

"A Pill Popping Past" Trifecta Week Eighty-Four

THIS POSTING IS MEANT FOR A MATURE AUDIENCE ONLY. 

This week's trifectawritingchallenge.com's word is "crude". We must use the third definition of the word in our story of between 33-333 words.

CRUDE
1: existing in a natural state and unaltered by cooking or processing <crude oil>
2 archaic : unripe, immature
3: marked by the primitive, gross, or elemental or by uncultivated simplicity or vulgarity <a crude stereotype>
4: rough or inexpert in plan or execution <a crude shelter>
5: lacking a covering, glossing, or concealing element :obvious <crude facts>
6: tabulated without being broken down into classes <thecrude death rate>


Remember:
  • Your response must be between 33 and 333 words. 
  • You must use the 3rd definition of the given word in your post. 
  • The word itself needs to be included in your response. 
  • You may not use a variation of the word; it needs to be exactly as stated above. 
  • Only one entry per writer. 
  • If your post doesn't meet our requirements, please leave your link in the comments section, not in the linkz. 
  • Trifecta is open to everyone. Please join us.
 
WARNING! FOR MATURE READERS ONLY!Week Eighty-Four
 
 A Pill Popping Past
Crude desire filled my every cell as I walked into the dank room.  The stranger’s wild, horny eyes met mine and we embraced, skin sliding smoothly with hot sweat and oily lubricant. Without saying a word, pornographic volumes spoke clearly with chemical passion.  Soon our naked and unprotected bodies connected to be one as my quivering entrance was received. I writhed in pain as the semi-hard monster tore at my bowel and stretched my innards tight. Deep huffs from the small brown jar of poppers made it easier to bear. We smoked more.
Hours before, I had been at a parTy smoking away at a clear glass bubble pipe. Crystalized poison melted as the blue flame from the torch brought the drug to a lave-like boil. Anticipation made rise to the fine hairs that covered the back of my neck.  I expertly rolled the tool between my fingers and dragged from the glass tube my first hit.  A thick cloud of toxic smoke made its way to the hungry chasm of my abused lungs and filled them full with danger. Instantaneously, my heart raced and my temperature rose. My senses were tweaked as the beast was unleashed from within. 
The electric hunt for sex was on. My fixed gaze into the bright screen of the computer made blinking impossible.  My dry veiny eyes longed for reprieve.  Entranced by the devil and staring at the backside of God, I shopped the nude pictures and dirty profiles of the site. I flirted with words and showed pics of my zity ass, until finally I had a hit, a date.  In a flash I was in the car and on my way to appease the insatiable crave the drug served.
Now, before bed each night, I put the pills into a small cup, there’s seven of them in all, and swallow them as a group. I will be reminded of careless nights like the one I just told you about for the rest of my life. 
Word count: 333 
 
 
 
 
 

18 comments:

  1. A very powerful story with an ending that will be remembered!

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  2. thanks gabriella, and hard to forget.

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  3. Shawn, you've done an amazing job of conveying context and undercurrent. A powerful last paragraph, yes, but just as powerful throughout.

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  4. the context was harsh reality, glad I can convey soberly. thanks for your kind reply.

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  5. This was brilliantly-realized work. There is an honesty throughout this journey that makes it beliveable and, therefore, all the more tragic. It is not just tragic for how it ends up but, tragic for the out-of-control nature of the addiction throughout. A tour-de-force performance. Thanks for creating such amazing work!

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    1. I appreciate your thoughtful words. Thank you.

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  6. This was graphic, however it served to tell a memorable and tragic story. That last paragraph was sobering.

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    1. Sobering indeed! Thank you for commenting janna!

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  7. Shawn, your honesty in sharing this gritty, well crafted piece took courage-and I admire you for it. You are a damn good writer.

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    1. Thanks Valerie! This kind of sharing is truly therapeutic for me, I'm glad you enjoyed it :)

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  8. Very real and raw! Nice work.

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    1. 2 words that really do summarize the piece. Your comment is appreciated Ivy :)

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  9. damn. talking about hitting a hard point with a rough edge. your description brought the raw point home. i particularly liked this line, "Entranced by the devil and staring at the backside of God..."

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  10. That's hawt.
    ha, seriously though... Powerful writing here! It carries quite the punch.

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  11. There's clearly more than one addiction here. Nice job dragging the reader into the dark underbelly of the protag's mind.

    Thank you for linking up. Please don't forget to return for the voting!

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  12. A powerful, fearless piece of writing. It takes courage to splash this kind of honesty all over the page, and that honesty pays off for your readers.

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  13. Wow, this line was poetic: "Entranced by the devil and staring at the backside of God..." Great writing!

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  14. Very visceral. The rawness of the experience burns, much like the smoke from the pipes burns the lungs. Well done!

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